Here is a quick sketch of what I have in mind.

It may be that throwing everything away and building a trailing arm system would be easier...but I have a good brake axle, I have good springs, and I really want to try to make this work.
If none of the ideas are worth a darn, then I will be wrong, and will have to say I should have listened to those guys the first time...
The concept is that the trailer keeps the leaf spring.
The shackle, and shackle mount are modified.
The shackle will bolt to the spring as is standard.
The rest of the shackle will have a slot machined most of its length, be around 10" long, maybe a half inch thick for strength, and will connect to a shoulder bolt or machined pin that runs though the frame (in a welded sleeve, with greasable bushing.
A set of air bags near the frame, with independent air fill valves will be used to lift/lower the frame from the axle.
The bags would connect to the frame rails, or to a 2 x 2 support between the frame rails.
The shackles, being connected to the frame with a single bolt, will be able to move up and down, and front to back to be able accommodate the see/saw motion of the leaf and air bag springs.
When traveling, the shackles do nothing but keep the springs from moving side to side, the air bags support the weight, the springs just hold it all together.
When lowered, the rear spring eye rests against the frame.
In an emergency, if the bags failed, the compressor failed, or whatever, the trailer could still be towed because it still has the leaf springs, which could still move forward and back.
It would be rough, but possible.
Rob
As you've noted, air bags have a sweet spot, a level/psi/height at which they offer the best ride.
It would be easy to buy a set that offers the ride height I need, at the middle ground of pressure.