1. Remove tie plates and don't replace them
2. Re-weld cracks on xmember flanges, and add fish plate. I like the idea of using angle iron instead of just a flat bar. From the sound of your explanation it looks like I'd want the vertical section of the angle iron to be above the horizontal plane of the angle iron and not below, hence your comment about grinding it down to pass under the tongue (and to not weld it to the tongue)
3. If I want to reinforce the tongue, use a truss method. Speaking of which....
I found this interesting pic from one of Andrew's from a while back that surprised me (http://tnttt.com/viewtopic.php?f=35&t=39508&start=15). I'm surprised that the middle design would be less effective than the first design. Just seems as though you'd want to spread the tension all along the arm from end to end, rather than terminating part way down - seems like there would be a lot of stress placed where the forward rod/flat bar terminates.