Edited to protect my reputation
Maryland To Ban Balls? by K.
A legislator in the state of Maryland wants the state to ban balls on public highways. Not balls as in baseballs, footballs, etc., but balls as in testicles.
State Delegate LeRoy E Myers, Jr., has introduced a bill to ban balls. His bill prohibits any "model, sign, sticker or other item" that shows uncovered human or animal genitals, as well as human buttocks or female breasts, from motor vehicles.
Myers sees his bill as a legislative public service.
In reality, Myers' bill is aimed at banning those plastic bull's balls some folks like to hang from the hitches on their pickup trucks and SUVs ... and apparently any other body part replica that some people may want to attach to their vehicles.
Washington County Sheriff's deputy Matthew Bragunier recently told the Herald-Mail newspaper that he figures that he sees, at least once a day, fake bull genitals flopping from the hitches of pickup trucks.
They're only a toy, but they're also unpleasant to look at, said Bragunier, worried what his 2-year-old girl might think someday.
Pamela Campbell, however, sees the fake bull genitals that she sells differently.
"Most people get a good smile out of it," she said. "It's not harmful."
Campbell, whose business is in Bullhead City, Arizona, said she was raised on a farm; anatomy was a lesson learned early and openly. She wondered why parents can't talk to their children about the facts of life.
And, thus, the great ball-banning debate has gotten underway in Maryland. Which side are you on? All those who oppose Myers' and Bragunier's view and who want to keep their balls, raise your right hands. WOW! Look at all those hands!
Okay, all those who support Myers' and Bragunier's view and support the ban, remove your balls. Right now. Don't hesitate. Right here in front of everyone, go ahead, remove your ... uh ... balls. Just use your wire-cutters to snip 'em right off if you have to. ... hates it when grown men cry.K.