We bumped up against this when we were planning our trip out west. One camp ground in San Jose had restrictions on how old your RV could be and that they had to be self contained. Come to find out they have a problem with breakin's and we would not have wanted to be there anyway. That was when we decided on Big Basin Redwoods State Park, one of our favorites. Woodalls tells you what amenities are available in a campground and you can infer from there whether you might bump into this.
We can be as self contained as any larger RV, porta potie... I would have been talking to some one higher up the food chain than a camp host who is temporary and It might be an idea to get a copy of rules and regs for future reference. It did look like an interesting camp site, fight for it.
With a bit of looking here are the regs
http://www.portsanluis.com/services/RVCampingRules.pdf and if you have a gray water tank and with your portapotie you would be well with in your rights to stay. The camp host phone and email is on the PDF, but I would contact the administration and file a complaint.
I would contact the administration.
Port San Luis Harbor Office 3950 Avila Beach Drive PO Box 249 Avila Beach, California 93424 (805) 595-5400
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