Humor of the Day

[halfdome, Danny]

Aspire to inspire before you expire.
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My wife and I had words, but I didn't get to use mine.
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Frustration is trying to find your glasses without your glasses.
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Blessed are those who can give without remembering and take without forgetting.
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The irony of life is that, by the time you're old enough to know your way around, you're not going anywhere.
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God made man before woman so as to give him time to think of an answer for her first question.
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I was always taught to respect my elders, but it keeps getting harder to find one.
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Every morning is the dawn of a new error.

[Ira]

It takes a religious nut to cold-cock someone for stating his beliefs, because those beliefs don't coincide with his. That's real "Christian."

What a bunch of hypocrites!

THERE IS NO GOD! GET OVER IT ALREADY, GUYS!

[Ma3tt]

Ira, its a joke...... mixing free speech, politics, the military and religious beliefs all into one. A great one for the upcoming fourth of July BBQ with family and friends, I am sure everyone will get a chuckle. Remeber if you don't laugh the terrorists win.

[Boodro]

Hey Ira , ITS A JOKE !!!! GET OVER IT !!!!!

[Steve_Cox]

[madjack]

Ira, I really don't know or care what set you of this time BUT in my not so humble opinion, when it comes to hypocrisy and religion and free speech, YOU are the biggest hypocrite here...get over it...
madjack

[Ma3tt]

Slow down folks these are the funny pages...


Why did the chicken cross the playground.......?


To get to the other slide!

[Gage]

And here I thought it was to get to Ira also.

Have a good day.

[swissarmygirl]

...well THEY always told me that the gods act in mysterious wayz ..................................
p.s....actually, I guess it is wasn't all that mysterious...she was just pi$$ed and sent in the Marines to take care of the little minded BS artist...

I just think its great that madjack referred to god as "she"
If that's not open-minded, I don't know what is!

[madjack]

SwAG, since my wife is Wiccan and I am an animist, open mindedness is a prerequisite at my household........
madjack

[TomS]

Alright. It's time to lighten things up around here.

This guy walks into a bar and sits at the bar. After a few minutes he notices the guy next to him has a tiny dwarf sitting on the bar playing a minature piano. Curious, the guy asks, "Hey, that's pretty cool! Where did you get it". The man with the dwarf gestures toward a gruff lookng gentleman sitting in the corner and says, "That old coot over there is a genie. He grants wishes".

At first our our hero was unconvinced. But after a few minutes he says, "What the Hell, I'll give it a try". So we wanders over the guy in the corner and says, "Excuse me, but that guy at the bar claims your a genie ....." The old coot inturpts him, "Yeah, yeah. Hey, Buddy, I gotta go. Make it quick. What do you want?" Our hero tells the genie his wish. The genie replies, "Done, go sit in your car and you'll get your wish in 20 minutes".

Our hero sits in his car still not quite believing the genie would grant his wish. After exactly 20 minutes there was a blinding flash of light. When our hero's eyes finaly adjusted to the dark, he saw ducks. Ducks inside the car, ducks outside the car, ducks on top of the car, ducks as far as the eye could see.

Our hero runs back into the bar. The genie is nowhere to be found. So he confronts the guy at the bar, "I asked that so-called genie for a million bucks. He sent me a million ducks". The guy at the bar looks up and says, "I didn't ask for a twelve inch pianist".

[Jiminsav]

SwAG, since my wife is Wiccan and I am an animist, open mindedness is a prerequisite at my household........
madjack

Jack, what cartoons did you draw?

[Micro469]

SwAG, since my wife is Wiccan and I am an animist, open mindedness is a prerequisite at my household........
madjack

Jack, what cartoons did you draw?

I thought an animist was someone who liked dressing up in furry costumes...................

[Ma3tt]

chupacabra = animist?

[madjack]

...goto wikipedia.org and enter animist to see one explantion...by the way, it is an animator that draws moving cartoons...an illustrator draws print catoons...I guess...
madjack