Dad Jokes

[rjgimp]

Fishing licenses are silly. I have never seen anyone drive a fish!

[Tom&Shelly]

Fishing licenses are silly. I have never seen anyone drive a fish!

Two fish are sitting in a tank. One says to the other, "do you know how to drive this thing?"

Tom

[tac422]

Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella?

Fo' Drizzle....

[Tom&Shelly]

Just came back from some last minute gift shopping at our local hardware store and found they're having a two for one sale on iron and carbon.

It's a steel!

Tom

[rjgimp]

Found stir fry all over my bed this morning

I must have been sleep wokking again.

[DJ Davis]

Why are there Pop-tarts, but no Mom-tarts? It's because of the pastryarchy.

[DJ Davis]

Most people have heard of Karl Marx, but few know of his sister, Onya, an Olympic runner. Her name is still mentioned at the start of every race....

[DJ Davis]

Most people don't know this, but the Supreme Court is just like a regular court, but it has sour cream and tomatos.

[tomhawk]

I hope this does not inhibit contributions to this thread but I am using this as a source. The level of humor here is usually appropriate for the zoom meeting I attend daily at my job. We rotate chairing it and I am supposed to provide humor when it is my turn.

What is the difference between the story of Romeo and Juliet, and COVID?

One is a corona virus, the other is a Verona crisis.

[rjgimp]

[rjgimp]

Now that we're into page 5 I have stopped looking back to see if we are repeating ourselves. Besides, great Dad jokes are worth repeating!


Never date a tennis player. Love means nothing to them.

[rjgimp]

I have a request, if any of you are on farcebook. I was a member of a 3700+ member MN based GM/Chev/Buick, etc... page. It had gotten stale and turned into a Marketplace dumping ground. Last summer it ended up without an admin and FB offered it to me so I took it over. Tried to clean it up a bit and refocus but it remained stale. So I decided on a completely new course a few months ago and renamed it All Dad Jokes All The Time! I got a flurry of activity for about a week and now very little. I have been the only one posting for several weeks, although I do get an occasional laugh or like emoji.

Anyway, please go to my fb page All Dad Jokes All The Time and bring your best (clean) Dad Jokes!

BTW... Derek Bieri, the Vice Grip Garage guy is a member. I keep hoping he'll dive in on the new game plan. I gotta imagine he's fairly adept at Dad Jokes.

[Tom&Shelly]

Yesterday, Shelly and I were at a rest stop on I 10 when a Dodge Omni came in burning oil. Guy said he drove it that way all the way from Florida, but I think he was just blowing smoke!

Tom

[Tom&Shelly]

If I ever start a jerky business, I'll call it "Road Kill Jerky, you smite 'em, we'll smoke 'em".

Tom

[rjgimp]

Wife told me to put ketchup on the grocery list.
Now I can't read it.