Infamous Critters I've Killed!

[SteveH]

Don't even think of hitting a ferral hog at 70 MPH. It's not a pretty story!

[Ira]

Too much information.

What are you--a Republican?

HAH! I couldn't resist!

[bobhenry]

2006 was my year. Driven over 40 year and never bagged anything bigger than a rabbit until Sept. 06. Farmer getting an early shot at harvest. Deer grazing in field. Bob crusing into work 6:30 a.m. on his Goldwing. Farmer scares deer, deer explodes from field into path of motorcycle. Deer scares hell out of Bob. Right side of fairing explodes on deers butt or sholder. All said and done $1700.00 poof !

One month later almost to the day big buck stands calmly on centerline of state highway. He knowes he's safely hidden in the fog. This time my pick-up gets the brunt of the vengence of the venison. He tries to run ,slips and falls. Talk about a speed bump. Bumper fender and strange new rattles underneath. I love communing with nature but not at highway speed.

[tonyj]

Took out a buzzard at 70 mph with my driver side rearview mirror. The bird probably didn't factor in the added take off weight of the road kill he had just feasted on. He almost made it, my rearview mirror vaporized, and my wallet was $175 lighter. I still slow down now when I spot buzzards near or on the road.

My other creature of choice--skunks! I have ushered every one I can to their next life on my property. I don't like killing animals, but my "smart" border collie Jake still hasn't figured out they aren't black and white kitties that willingly stop to let him smell their butt!! I have tried the various shampoo and smell remover formulas, but he likes the tomato juice skin conditioning the best as it passes the lick test with flying colors. Hmmm. . . maybe that is why he keeps chasing the skunks. Stupid dog.

[Jiminsav]

My neighbor "bagged" a raccoon last week with his new Dodge magnum wagon. Lower valance, bumper cover, radiator, A/C condenser, underbody cover all wiped out. the bill so far is around $1700.00 and climbing!!
He swears its the last time he's doing road kill hunting.

Man, no wonder Chrysler is going out of business..$1700.00 for a racoon is a little bit preposterous.

[Rob]

I've got timber rattlers with a rock to their neck from ten feet. Then a friend placed a stick on their head while I used my pocket knife to remove said head. Didn't have to worry about seeing that rattler the next day when working the timberland.

A friend of mine used to duck hunt with his U-2 while working for Uncle Sam.

[Juneaudave]

Skunk...hit by the car ahead of me that I was following a bit too close...bounced off the pavement and right into the grill and radiator of my 70' Pontiac T-37......a memory that I shall never forget!!!

[Jst83]

I was flying down the road through the country one day and almost hit a cow.
He was in the road, funny thing is there were no fields around with cows in that he could have came from.

And yes I was sober

[dhazard]

Anyone try hitting a dove at 70 on a motorcycle. With my Goldwing you would get a thump, then some feathers floating around for the next mile or two. Now the time I hit one on my 750 without a faring… knocked the wind out of me, bird guts all over my chest, thought I was going to die.

[asianflava]

We ran the "One Lap of Florida" rally many years ago. It started out in West Palm Beach, across the state to Naples, up to Brooksville then overnighted in Ocala. The next night we came down thru Daytona, Melbourne and back to WPB.

At the stop in Ocala it looked like everyone had hit some kind of animal. I hit a family of raccoons (mamma and babies) on alligator alley, which was better than the guy who actually hit an alligator. Another guy in a Lotus hit a dog I felt bad for him.

[dahoon]

Now may I explain to you my theory on:

"The right of ascension of the animal kingdom."

Keep in mind we were living in the mountains of northeast Washington State for eleven years. So this theory is a well proven and documented fact. I have either hit or was hit by no less than 9, yes count them 9, deer in that time. There wasn't a car we didn't own that I didn't hit at least one deer with. My boys wouldn't let me drive their cars, stiil don't know why. And I am a safe driver without getting tickets. Most were at night or early mornings on twisty mountain roads Okay sorry I digress.

First, let me ask the question, has anyone seen an animal cross the road more than 100 yards in front of your vehicle? Now think hard. The cases that I have heard of have seen this happen have been few and far between, very very rare.

Inorder for an animal to achieve adulthood they have a certain level of points they must score to become an adult. The closer that they cross to a vehicle the more points they score. Conversely, the further away from the car they cross the fewer points they will receive. So it's on a scale the closer the more points; the further away the fewer the points.

Too far from the vehicle no points, too close to the vehicle and:

S-M-A-C-K

GAME OVER MAN!

I have had deer jump down off of the hillside (30') land in the ditch and jump in front of me. I even had a deer try to pass me in town and I was only going less than 25MPH. I hit her she rolled over, got up and kept on going.
The first deer cost me $2400. and the last deer just left a few hairs on the bumper.
So, if you want deer to be hit let me borrow your keys and away we go.

Mike
p.s.: Since we moved from there 2-1/2 years ago I haven't hit a one. And my wife even lets me drive her new Tahoe.

[Spadinator]

I had to put a moose down the other day after it got hit by an Isuzu Rodeo. The SUV basically took out the moose' legs and it "sat" on the hood of the Rodeo. Needless to say they both lost....the moose lost it's life and the Rodeo was a write off........

[Kens]

Lets see 16 years old in my $100 dollar 57 chevy. You know those points on the hood, opens a bird very fast and deposits it on the windsheild. 21 years old missed the cat late at night but hit the dog chasing it. About same age got up late for my National Guard meeting started my car no gas took my dads and hit a deer. I could go on but why. Ken

[cam5e]

Hey Kens,
I'll bet you wish you still had that $100 Chevy.

[Laredo]

Never, ever ever, wear a white shirt and bleached jeans riding through dove country.

Took forever to get all the bits out of the Honda Hawk. Happened in '79 and I still smell it when I think about it.